Coming Out Ep.4: Coming Out to Strangers





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I was always very open about being queer, or, before that word entered my vocabulary, liking girls. Like always. Even primary school.

So telling strangers wasn't a big deal. What I mean by strangers is, maybe acquaintances, friends of friends, tutors, colleagues, etc.

It's never a big deal to me unless I sense that maybe that's weird for them. Usually I just act normal until they figure it out, I'm not a huge believer in coming out being something you 'have' to do. But when it comes to older generations, especially elderly people, or middle-aged men (like my dad-type men), I get a little weirded out by the prospect. I go by the same method, but it's a significant decrease in how much they will actually catch on. For example, my parents are both 60+, and have not caught on to any signs I've blatantly left.

Once was told to act straight, when getting a pciture taken, and replied "that'll be hard." Went right over their heads.

This is what I'm dealing with, but that's the next episode, folks.

For now, strangers should not be a big deal to you, and if it does, why does it matter? You don't owe someone you don't know anything. They know nothing else about you, so if it goes wrong, be glad they aren't a part of your life. And that's worse case scenario. My generation is sort of under the impression that it doesn't chnage anything about you, no one really makes it a big deal, and who cares? Plus, and this is me assuming you're in your 20s or under, the people around you will probably catch on. Usually I get a shy "... are you gay?" and I always find it funny.

If you really want someone to catch on, maybe you like someone you're talking to for one of the first times and they have no idea (or that's what you think), maybe throw in a few "I love Hayley Kiyokos" or talk about the gay club you go to, or wear some rainbows. That's bound to send a message.

Otherwise, float through life not caring. Coming out to friends and family is what matters (one isn't that hard either) so don't let this one feel like a horrible "what if I bump into a homophobe." Most homophobes stay well away anyway (I've had a woman move herself and her children away from me on the bus).

This wasn't a very heavy one, be prepared for the next addition, where I actually come out to my family.

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